Ignoring Pleas of Family and Friends

67 Responses

  1. Heidi says:

    Tyler, my hardest thing is breaking my love affair with food. Unlike you, I have actually been a healthy eater my whole life. Vegetarian, lots of whole grains, fruits, etc. However, you can be fat no matter what you eat. As you are well aware, it’s all about calories in needing to be less than calories used. I have lost twelve pounds and now I’m stalling a bit, kind of losing my steam I guess. I don’t want to stop at 12 pounds. I started at 244 pounds and need to at least drop 70. (I’m a woman.) Keep up the good work. I check your site every day. 244poundmom

  2. Chris Pugh says:

    Interesting, I had quite the opposite from my family (and I got much larger than you). At nearly 500 lbs, nobody in my family ever said anything to me… I really wished they had. I almost feel betrayed by them in some way, I know it’s probably not how I should feel though. I’m on the way down now, it’s take me much longer than you to figure my “stuff” out and you’ve been a huge inspiration for my journey. Keep up the good work!

  3. Shane says:

    Your words hit home to me. Last year I had ballooned to 385 pounds and as of yesterday I’m down to 336. I have a long way to go and your blog here helps keep me focused. Thanks for the inspiration! I’m 33 and the reasons for trying to lose weight quickly shifted from looking better to living long enough to see my son grow up once I entered my 30’s. I too have had family members make comments about my weight but instead of doing something about it I would just get angry and eat more. I finally decided that I wasn’t going to dig my own grave with a spoon. I hope many others will decided to not let their own appetite destroy them like I have done for so long.

  4. Lizz says:

    as a female with bi-polar and PMDD, i find it very difficult to maintain a weight loss plan once either one of them kick in. (a “diet” for me only lasts no longer than 2 weeks due to moods) I have never been a healthy eater and now at 30 yrs old i’m weighing in at 191 (the same for the past 3 years) (((no i don’t take meds because i look at it as they will kill me before my food & moods will)))
    Q: Do you have a certain something that keeps replaying in your head over and over that helps keep you focused and motivated? Something so strong that it overpowers the want of food, & your everyday life set backs?
    Keep up the good work and I can’t wait for your book!

  5. ElGabachoNaco says:

    My wife has been the only one to suggest I lose weight. My father, after having a heart attack, just told me to “take care of yourself”. Now that I’m 35, the effects of years of being overweight… no, obese… are beginning to manifest themselves.

    My weakness is fast food. I do better when I work @ home and the wife is here to keep an eye on me. When I commute to the office, I’m more tempted to grab something. Drive-thru breakfast is my biggest weakness.

    I’ve been losing weight, eating fewer calories, eating a little every 3 hours, and working out. I feel great after working out. Mornings are my biggest weakness for eating crap, though. I hate working out in the mornings, but wonder if that might help?

    Any insights?

  6. Dan says:

    Great post Tyler

  7. Jaclyn says:

    Oh Tyler the Tank,
    I care for you friend!
    Hooray for no squirrels!

  8. Wow Tyler! This quote *really* jumped out at me:
    “The five-second thrill I derived from food was more important to me than all the friends and family members that pleaded with me to change.”
    THANK YOU!!!


  9. Michelle says:

    How would you suggest bringing up the subject? I’ve got a friend who’s over 300lbs at least.. apart from us living very far apart (about 2500 km) there’s no support for him at home. Girlfriend doesn’t care too much about him, and he’s recently lost his mother, basically the only family he had left.

  10. Tara says:

    You never cease to amaze me Tyler. Here you are after losing your dad and you’re reaching out to us. If there is anything I want more it’s to be a more nicer, caring human being such as yourself.

    You are going to go out in the world and create a change that will be so monumental even you can’t imagine. Thanks for helping me stay focused, determined and most of all for helping me be more like you.

    Tomorrow I’m going to run 3.1 miles and it’s all for you!


  11. Shauna says:

    I have a hard time giving up my favorite comfort foods….I know that my health is more important but dangit…I like food! And that, I’m so afraid, will be my demise. 🙁

  12. Leslie Limon says:

    Hi Tyler! I found your blog through another weight loss blog that I’m following. First of all, I’d like to offer my condolences. Losing a parent is never easy.

    Now can I just say that your story is such an inspiration! I’m just starting out on my weight-loss journey and I hope and pray that I am able to make it through. I am adding you to my “Inspiration and Motivation” blog roll! 🙂

  13. Mary says:

    Tyler, I ran across your blog after eat anything picked you up and you seemed to be commercial.. tears ran when your father died as I know from experience how that feels. This post makes me know you’re real … don’t take offense. I just want to thank you. Know your family loves you and is proud of YOU. You’ve changed peoples lives… you’ll be there for your child, you’re wife and impact people… I’m struggling but the goal is in front of me… i just have to beat those hurdles.

  14. Rob says:

    Hi Tyler,
    I found your blog a few weeks ago and I identified with your story a ton. Im a 23 year old guy that at one point pushed over 350 lbs. I’m sick of being overweight. I’ve been overweight since I can remember, and it’s interesting because my parents never kept junk food or soda around the house. However, when I eat, I eat a lot. Diets have never worked for me because I end up hungry. I read your entire blog from page 90 something to this page in just a few days time. What an incredible journey and experience you have taken. It’s gotten me motivated to have gone to the gym the past 3 days in a row. The elliptical is my weapon of choice as well. I’m at 328 right now and hope to make good progress. The thing that amazed me about your journey is how you managed to limit the amount of food you ate at meals. I’m usually not satisfied with one helping of food. I want to eat until I feel full. Any tips? Maybe its all the water you drink? My condolences on the passing of your father and I can’t wait to see your progress in building muscle!

  15. Rebekah says:

    Tyler that was so inspriring! Thank you for stepping outside of your grief and allowing us some more comforting words from you. I am currently 289 and started up a gym membership after finding that home exercise wasn’t giving me the results I wanted. So, what are your favorite workouts and best calorie burning exercises? I would love some new stuff to do…I have been a gym person many times and get bored fast.

    Thank you again,

  16. As well as I’m going right now in my weight-loss adventure, I had a cold cereal binge the other night. The thrill (a great word that you used), was evident. I loved it, but immediately felt guilty after I did it.

    Tonight? I’m staying away from the cereal. But, yeah, the thrill…I totally get that.

  17. James Trapani says:

    I am with you Tyler! Lost 51 pounds so far. I’m currently at 191. While reading your post I got to the line:

    “The five-second thrill I derived from food was more important to me than all the friends and family members that pleaded with me to change.”

    That made me stop and re-read that line. You are so right and that will be something I continue to think about in my head the next time I want a bacon double cheeseburger!! THANK YOU!

  18. Tyler says:

    Thanks for checking everyday, Heidi. I love food, as well, but you have to remember that we eat to live and not live to eat. It’s just food. There are more important things like your life, family, friends, and well being.

    I’m not sure if you have ever been at your goal weight before, but trust me, the more you lose the better/easier life gets.

  19. Tyler says:

    That’s an interesting contrast, Chris. That probably just has to do with the type of family — my family, God love them, is loud, blunt, and opinionated. They had no problem telling me, whether it hurt me or not.

    Congrats on losing 112 pounds! Keep up the good work.

  20. Tyler says:

    Good job, Shane.

    “Dig your own grave with a spoon…” quotable stuff, my friend.

  21. Tyler says:

    Yes. Honestly, you guys keep playing in my head. I have to report back to you, just like you guys have to report back to me. This isn’t about me anymore, this is about showing you what I can do.

    I don’t want to let you down.

    Even if you don’t have any friends/family that you can count on to hold you accountable or lose weight for, would you mind doing it for me and the rest of us?

  22. Tyler says:

    You just have to tell yourself no. I can’t drive the car for you, neither can your wife. You either want it bad enough or you don’t. I know drive-thru breakfasts were a major staple in my old lifestyle, but after I learned you can make eggs, bacon, and toast with jelly at home and it be HEALTHY for you — well, I’m fine with eating that in the morning. It takes time, but you simply need to make time for it. Prioritize.

    I hate working out in the mornings personally, I workout around 8-9 PM every night.

  23. Tyler says:

    Great blog, Dan.

  24. Tyler says:

    Oh, Jaclyn. You need an image for your name. Go to gravatar.com and get one for free!

  25. Jerry says:

    Tyler –

    I have been reading (and commenting) for a while now. Recently, I spoke with my mom about my weight loss. My family said the exact same things – I think it is a growing up process. I still have family that are really big. I really want them to see the light, but don’t know how to approach it without sounding as preachy as the others in my family. Do you think it would be easier to hear from someone who has been there? In your experience, have people you have spoken to about weight before and after made the change as well? I wonder because I remember resenting people for “talking me down”.

    I want to see them succeed, but don’t want to hurt feelings. Any ideas?

  26. Mark says:

    I keep a cannister of Oatmeal at my desk and use the water from the coffee machine in the mornings. It’s not the most flavorful but definitely is a healthier option to fast food. Also started mixing a scoop of protein powder in which gives it some flavor and extra protein.

    Found this site a couple months ago. Tyler, thanks for the inspiration.

  27. Jennifer says:

    My two biggest problems 1) I LOVE food and 2) I am LAZY
    I had been doing really well about 2-3 years ago- I hada gym near my office that opened at 6 so I could get up at 5 be to the gym by 6 start work at 7:30 be at school at 5 and home by 8pm- that was exhausting! – work moved and I have yet to find a gym well located with good opening hours (I am in belgium, no 24 hour gyms here that I know of)

    But, I have been following your website and have become motivated again to restart Weight Watchers and, with the weather warming up, I have been riding my bike- not far yet just 10 miles or so, but it’s a start.

    I have also been scheduling “active visits” with friends- instead of meeting at a cafe trying to meet for a bike ride or hike- not always easy to do- but I am trying!

  28. BuckeyeBetty says:

    Me too. I never thought of overeating as selfish. Until I lost the weight, I didn’t realize the impact my unhappiness was having on everyone around me. I was never in a “your weight will kill you zone”, but the family was concerned because they knew I wasn’t being everything I coud be as a person. I thought they picked at it because I was fat and they were embarassed for me.

  29. Big Nick says:

    Sometimes your need a jolt to your psyche to make permanent change. Starting my journey at 359.8 lbs on January 4th when I couldn’t get life insurance. I was 31, engaged to the love of my life, now had two children, a home, business, assets, and I was eating myself to death. I had no means to protect my family long term. Never felt I deserved to life longer than my father did (he passed at 39). Finally something clicked. I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. I found, in therapy, that I deserved to outlive my father and his death had nothing to do with me. That relief of guilt, and the love for my daughters, and support of my finacee (she’s down 27 lbs too), I am making that like change. Nearly 4 months into my journey, I have lost 64 lbs. 2000 calories a day, exercise 5 days a week. I have been take off my blood pressure meds and my pre-diabetes meds. Next I’m kicking the cholesterol meds. Each day is a gift, so why not try and maximize the number of gifts we can receive.

    Thanks for the inspiration Tyler. Looking forward to being down near 200 lbs with you soon.

  30. Kyle says:


    I’ve been following your blog since January, and your story continues to be an added inspiration for me as well. Having a great community like this really helps get through tough times. Not with just our weight loss journeys, but with other curve balls that life throws us as well. Thanks for continuing to post, and keep being you!

  31. Katelyn says:

    Tyler- i started off well, and since January I have lost about 35lbs. but i know i could have lost more. for the last month or so, i have been losing and regaining the same pound or 2…and it is so frustrating! i don’t know what im doing in a gym…so it is hard to work out…and my mom whom i live with does not bring healthy food into the house….i eat better and healthier on my college campus with the buffet style cafeteria than i do in my own home! i just don’t know what to do anymore! i am so discouraged! my “fat clothes” still fit, i have dropped maybe 2 sizes…but not everywhere on my body is seeing that big of a difference.
    any tips?

  32. greg says:

    293, down from 336, 43lbs. Food is a damn drug. Scientists with too much time on their hands determined the average male thinks about sex every 30 seconds. For me it’s food every 27.3 seconds. Quitting ciggies and alcohol would be easier — just imagine if you had to cut back while having a recommended daily allowance of nicotine and booze!

    I got the lecturing from the family and the whole bit about heart disease being in my family. My dad had his quadruple bypass and the blood flow to his legs is completely shot. He can’t go more than a hundred yards without having to shit and rest like his legs just carried him a marathon.

    I’ve made progress losing before but backsliding is so easy because food is so comforting. It dulls your senses more comfortably than alcohol.

    Bah. 280 is the next big goal. Ultimate goal is 230 and see what tweaking I need to do from there. My guess is my proper weight is the 220’s. Death to whoever brings in the bagels!

  33. Misty says:

    This was the comment that jumped off the page for me too. But I don’t know how to overcome those 5 second highs…. Why do I seem to need them so badly???

  34. Tyler says:

    We don’t need them so badly. We just think we do. Our body really craves to be lean, fit, and athletic. We want to be able to do things we couldn’t yesterday with our bodies.

  35. Tyler says:

    I don’t want to touch that with a ten foot pole. I didn’t want anybody to bring the subject up to me, so I wouldn’t recommend doing it to anybody else. They have to want to lose weight.

    If you absolutely feel like you should do something, just drop very subtle hints. Tell him you found a cool website (hey, this one!) and that’s it’s helping YOU with your weight loss journey. Don’t ever make the conversation about him — once it does, it’ll be uncomfortable and he’ll not want to talk to you anymore.

  36. Tyler says:

    Thanks, Tara. Run those 3.1 miles and I’ll be building my leg miles!

  37. Tyler says:

    Take the food out of your house. Problem solved. You really have to be tough with yourself, nobody can watch you 24/7. You need to have the willpower to resist from eating junk at home, and if you don’t, simply don’t allow that type of food around you.

  38. Tyler says:

    I really appreciate it, Leslie! You have such a nice blog!

  39. Tyler says:

    I’m not commercial. They sponsor me and allow me to spend more time on the blog and add more features/abilities to the blog. It’s good for all of us, trust me.

    I’m very real. Ask those who have been here since the beginning. I posted for a year without any sort of “advertising.” It’s not a crime to make a little money doing what you love.

    I really appreciate the comment, Mary. I’m glad you found the blog, sorry I made you tear up a bit!

  40. Tyler says:

    I’m glad I motivated you, Rob. The elliptical is a good weapon of choice as it’s easy on the joints — you need that until you get that weight a little lower.

    You do need to drink a lot of water, I drink 100+ ounces a day — it will make you fill full. Other than that, simply walk away when you’re done eating. You don’t need that stuffed filling to be full, you just need to make sure you’re getting enough calories and if you are, stop eating.

  41. Tyler says:

    My favorite workouts happen a lot on the machines these days. It’s powering to lift more weight than you did last week.

    As far as calorie burning, high incline on the treadmill. That will burn some calories off of you.

  42. Tyler says:

    That’s the problem — the thrill that lasts a few minutes brings days and months and years of regret. Not worth it.

  43. Tyler says:

    Congrats on the weight loss, James!

  44. Tyler says:

    Like I said above, you have to wait on them to come to you. You can’t force them to want change.

  45. Tyler says:

    Good, Jennifer! Good luck with Weight Watchers, keep us updated on your progress!

  46. Tyler says:

    That’s an awesome routine, Nick. 64 pounds in a few months, you certainly can’t beat that. I know what it’s like not being able to get insurance because of your weight — I was denied health insurance.

    Here’s to 200 pounds!

  47. Tyler says:

    Thanks Kyle, I agree!

  48. Tyler says:

    Congrats on the weight loss so far. 35 pounds is quite a bit of weight to drop in only a few months. As far as your mom bringing in junk food to the house, can you ask her to leave it at work or hide it from you in her bedroom? Try to talk to her, be open.

    And don’t be discouraged with where you are. What you did yesterday has no impact on the decisions and the results of those decisions that you will reap tomorrow.

    Just get started again today.

  49. Tyler says:

    Don’t get discouraged and don’t let food control you. Trust me, it’s worth losing the weight. Do what you need to do to make it happen.

  50. Tyler,

    You’ve been one great inspiration! Thank you. I read your CNN article in January. I was pretty much giving up the weight-loss battle by then. Your article was like a light switch.

    One week later my wife and I were exercising and watching those calories. So far I’ve lost 58 lbs! You truly helped me believe it could be done.

    I’m ashamed to say that I loved feeding myself more than just about anything else; more than my wife, more than my kids, more than my life.

    Now, I still get to eat my wife’s good cooking, but I just don’t eat all of it at once. I enjoy just about everything in moderation, within my calorie limit.

    Thanks again for all you’ve done and shared. If you don’t mind, I will continue to lean on you for inspiration and advice to make it through my goal.


    Brian Bywaters

  51. Melissa says:

    Hey Rob,

    I’m not usually a commenter, just a lurker. I’ve been reading Tyler’s blog since the beginning and have lost about 80 lbs myself (substantial on a 5′ 2” frame).

    Anyway, I just wanted to add my two cents. I found that pacing myself during meals was a really big deal. Your body takes about 20 minutes to even register being full, so maybe take a break and see if you really need the second helping.

    Also, don’t cut down your meals hugely at first. I’m not a doc, and this may not be right, but I think I actually lowered my stomachs capacity by down sizing my meals over time.

    And of course, if you’re still looking for sheer volume – vegetables. I have been known to eat an entire bag of baby carrots in one sitting. Still not so good with the portion control, but at least it’s a bag of carrots and not a bag of Doritos like it was previously. 🙂

  52. Brian says:


    I follow your post daily.

    I am struggling….I just can not get started and when I do, I go strong for a week then I start to taper off and by the end of week 2 I am back into my old habits.

    I get so mad at myself when I think of who I was and what I was capable of at one time. I was a college athlete who was very big, 6’4 290 lbs with less than 8% body fat. I could bench press a small car and run as fast and as long as any one who was 135lbs. Then after college I joined the military. I was part of a elite unit and was part of a scout platoon. I was the in the best shape of my life here, I was able to run 5 miles under 40 minutes with ease with hardley breaking a sweat. Then came the day I got injured in the military and that was all she wrote…….I came home injured and broken. I started feeling sorry for myself and the weight started to pile on. That 290 pound athlete became 290 pounds of fat. I lost everything in my life during this time and lost everything physically that I had worked so hard for.

    During this time and have ballo0ned up to 400lbs and my BMI is over 45% fat. My legs hurt everyday and getting dressed in the morning is a struggle because nothing fits or looks good on bigger people. Walking up steps is not fun because I have to stop half way to rest. In the military I was trained to watch and observe and now when I go places I watch people staring at me and I know what they are thinking. I would love to be able to go to a mall again and shop. I would love to be able to run again. I would love to put on my shoes without breaking a sweat.

    That brings me to today, everyday I read your post and I tell myself I am going to do it just like you — website and all. Today will be the day, if tyler can do it so can I! then everyday 4:30 rolls around and I am to tired to go to the gym or find a reason not to and I head home, walk up the steps and stop half way to rest, walk in the door and then back to the same old routine……I tell myself tomorrow, then tomorrow gets here and who the hell starts going to the gym mid week? Monday I will start back up…….Rinse and repeat welcome to my life for the last 6 years…….

    How can I do this? The scary part is I feel myself dieing inside and everyday thats time off my life because of this weight and I am doing nothing about it….

  53. Wendy says:

    Hi Tyler! I am so happy to have found your site as you inspire and encourage so many. I, too, am a continual work in progress. I was an obese child and have struggled with extra weight my whole life. But this year, I decided to fight even harder. I have been blessed with three beautiful, healthy children and was so disgusted with the fact that I wasn’t enjoying my life with them to the fullest. Celebrating moments with them as they grow is way more satisfying to me than any brownie could ever be.

    I look forward to watching your success as you touch so many lives in the process!

  54. Vanessa says:

    Hey Tyler,
    Your title “ignoring friends and family” grabbed at my heartstrings today. I imagine the sympathy you have recieved is overwhelming. (As it should be.) What kind of people would we be if we didn’t feel eachothers pain? Everyone wants to make it better. I wish I could too. But the reason I’m writing is that I am really proud that you are digging in with all your heart and saying no to our American-style comfort…FOOD, food, and more food coupled with mindless activites like; TV. It’s what I would do…and have done in the past when totally stressed out. God bless you for keeping on. I’m just so impressed.
    Still praying for your sanity,

  55. Chrissy Lif says:

    I’m sorry you’ve had such a tough week, Tyler. I’m inspired by your amazing ability to gain perspective from things and how you are able to connect the dots from years and years past and make everything in your life have meaning. You should be super proud. Keep your chin up and keep focused on being healthy and inspiring others and being a good role model for your baby girl!

  56. I had a similar experience a few years ago with my grandma. She looked me right in the eye and seriously told me I was getting fat.

    I was remarkably upset about the comment. But I understand now that she was concerned with my health.

  57. Tim P says:

    So I went to the barber for the first time in 3 months, can you believe I fit in the regular barber chair, how awesome will it be to be able to kiss KingSize Direct and Casual Male XL goodbye! To be able to use my army cot camping instead of the monstrosity for Living XL.

    Keep it up Tyler, you are really an inspiration!

  58. Rob says:

    Hey Mellissa and Tyler,
    thanks for the replies and advice. I definately need to slow down while eating. I tend to Put food down very quickly.

  59. Mike says:

    I have now finished my first month of weight loss. I am 35, and I started April 1st at 318 pounds. Todays weigh-in put me at 293 pounds. It has been an excellent month for me.

    I would like to say I am doing it because of my health or because I did not like being fat, but I really didnt come around and put much thought into it until I started reading what you have written. Even after seeing your blog for the first time months ago I just wrote off starting because I figured I was too busy to start going to a gym every day and because my weight had been stable but very high for years now that somehow it was ok. I told myself my weight was fine as long as I lost it before I was 30, and I found myself 35 and still had not progressed at all.

    A month ago I could only walk for 5 minutes without my calf muscles hurting so much I had to stop for 5 minutes just to be able to continue, and now after walking every day at least 30 minutes and more every chance I have, I have moved to being able to go 5 miles without stopping ( only the bottom of my feet hurt now ).

    I am going shopping today for my first smaller belt in many years. I am very happy with myself, I have managed to push through slow weight loss during my second week, and everything about this experience has made me happy.

    I do have one problem I know nothing about though and it has been bothering me significantly. I have found that while I am very happy with myself and my progress, I seem to find myself getting upset much easier than normal. I have lots of support from both family and work, but I have been getting angry quicker at things that used to not bother me. I have been a very mellow and likeable person my entire life, and the last 2 weeks I have not really been like that. I thought perhaps I was not eating enough and increased my daily intake a little bit more, but I dont want to start eating too much again just because I seem to get angry easier now. Traffic, problems at work I used to just say no problem and fix it, the little things that never bothered me before now get me upset. I dont lash out or anything, but I am a bit worried that increased stress is going to affect the rest of my weight loss.

    Did you ever experience anything like that?

  60. Sarah says:

    I’ve been stalking you blog for a little while. You amaze me.

    I have no idea where to even begin in dealing with my weight loss. No idea. So, I just continue doing what I’ve always done. The thing is, I know its not about the “work” of eating better and moving more. I’m sure I am capable of doing those things. It’s about getting my head in the game. I don’t believe I can find my way there – to a place where I can get my head around it.

    I keep hearing people saying that there is a moment where they are now dedicated to a new way of living… What if that moment never comes?

    Eye of the Tiger… I think that is a great choice.

  61. Frank Dobner says:

    The way to get separated from historical food patterns, is to ignore the history. Be in the vision of what you want to create and the food will follow-in on your journey. That is what I do.

  62. Tabby says:

    Hi Tyler!

    I found your blog after I started changing my eating on April 6th .
    As of yesterday I am 304 lbs, down from 314 lbs.

    All I am doing is eating 2000 calories a day + walking. I take one day to have a “free” meal with a dessert, then I am right back on track. So far, this has been helping me from binge eating.

    I guess my question here is, did you ever start to feel scared once you started to lose some weight in the beginning?

    I must keep going. I have a 6 yo daughter and a husband that needs me to be around.

    I am 42, and I am scared that I won’t be around to see my daughter grow up.

    I too used to be very athletic. I was a principal ballerina, then life came hurling alot of changes at me and I stopped caring about myself.

    Thank you SO much for your blog, and reaching out to us. Bless your heart.

  63. Rebekah says:

    Yes, the weights have been good to me too! Incline, incline, incline…sounds good. Recently took a spinning class too! Yicks!

  64. Uncle Sam says:

    I dont think you have been under 200 since the sixth grade. I am proud of you.

  65. Shugee says:

    I took a very long time to find the “perfect time” to start as I was also in a disappointing life and was waiting for it to get better before beginning. I overwhelmed myself with a mountain of expectations that unless I did “perfectly,” consistently and to the max, I gave myself a big FAIL grade. The best gift I gave myself was to do just one tiny thing each week – make one little change. Maybe it would be to have a smaller breakfast for one day that week, or perhaps I would do one workout on Wednesday. That’s all I had to do for the entire week – just the one thing. The thing I chose was not something that would torment me, but something that I could do rather easily and positively. I didn’t really have to plan ahead; it could be a spontaneous choice to chew gum while watching TV rather than binging on snacks. Whatever it was, however small it was, I gave it respect. If I overthought it (“If I’m only going to do one thing, it’d better be good.”) or diminished it (“It really wasn’t a big enough deal to count.”), I realized I was falling again into the FAIL trap, so I would relax and drop the backpack of expectations that burdened me. Gradually, I started adding more small things each week, as choices started getting easier and more familiar and I learned to respect my successes.

  66. Nwuese says:


    It is not true that you can be fat no matter what you eat. If you lived in Nigeria you would be thin.

    You are just lying to yourself when you say you are a healthy eater and you don’t overeat.


    Stop eating so much and you will lose weight.

    Eat like a Nigerian and you will be slim. There are almost NO obese people in Nigeria or in any other African country for that matter (except for Mauritania) because in general Nigerians (and most Africans) do not eat as much as you do.

    The next time you open your mouth to eat, ask yourself – What Would a Nigerian Eat (WWNE) and eat that much.

  67. Rich says:

    WWNE … Love it.

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