Putting Aside Sales Pitches & Magic Cures

17 Responses

  1. Matt says:

    Reading this, all I can think of is “Where in the hell is she living where every single person comes up and tells her how fat she is?”.

    Damn. If I was her husband, I’d have punched everyone in town by now.

  2. Katie55 says:

    That story burns me up. How can people be so evil and clueless?

    So glad you have figured it out. At 54, I finally did, too. Track calories, exercise, support others and ask for help yourself. That’s it. No magic pills. No magic people except yourself.

  3. Campbell says:

    That’s what I was thinking! Then I got to the 23 years ago part. I guess people were less … PC then? But still.

  4. Michele Franks says:

    I am exactly the same weight and height as this woman and have experienced similar emotional pain and mistreatment for my weight. I would love to be her weight loss buddy–any way you can put the two of us in touch?

    Thanks,
    Michele

  5. Saren Triff says:

    I was also thinking.. “where the heck does she live?! What culture is she a part of that is so critical?”

    I am hispanic and recently moved to New England.. among the multitude of differences is the definition of what is “fat”. My definition is “fat” is overweight and “obese” is obese.. but it seems people here consider “fat” obese. They are entirely too forgiving up here, lol. Hispanics in general find being fat unacceptable soI got similar treatment to you.. except, I was never thin to start with. I always thanked my lucky stars I wasn’t because they had no basis for comparison but, it didn’t help too much.

    I admire you for finally breaking free of your own prison. I have as well.. only one child later and at 24yrs old. See, never having been thin before gave me the advantage, lol. I got tired of being fat sooner cuz I’ve been fat longer lol (not necessarily).

    I wish all of the US would figure out that the companies and food industry don’t want you to succeed, they will lose money. We come from a country which at first had simple advertising to sell products but now has become bloated with competition for the same money. We used to trust our local grocery store or hardware store to sell us what was best for us.. now, we are finding that these companies and stores are selling whatever they think you’ll buy, selling what is best for their pocket. If that means packing a dish at Chilies with 4800mg of sodium, so be it! (from book “eat this not that” changed my life).

    You go for doing it for yourself… that seems to be the hardest part. Accepting that you matter and reminding yourself that you are not a garbage can and you CAN leave food on your plate!

  6. Christina Miller says:

    Wow, people are so uneducated!! We set them straight though ,right!!! Haha I’m in the process of losing weight, so far 23 lbs in 14 weeks!! I have to lose at least 200, but with inspiring people like you guys, it really helps! (((HUGS))))

  7. Tyler says:

    I agree, I thought the same thing. But trust me, not my family now, but by listening to stories of my mom, aunts, uncles, etc., I can see with a slight stretch that my family was this blunt 20+ years ago.

  8. Tyler says:

    That’s it. The magic inside of us!

    I should trademark that.

  9. Tyler says:

    I’ll send her your contact information, I can’t just give it out. I’ll tell her to shoot you an e-mail. Understand though, it’s different posting a story up anonymously and making direct contact with a stranger online talking about weight problems…

    I didn’t have a problem with it, but don’t be shocked if she doesn’t want to chat. Just giving you a warning 🙂

  10. Tyler says:

    You’re right, companies are looking for their bottom line. While there are certain companies competing for the dollars of “healthy” folks, there’s a lot more money to be made in being fat and gluttonous.

  11. Tyler says:

    Glad, good luck! I’ll tell you two true stories.

    One, you won’t lose that weight overnight.
    Two, you WILL lose that weight if you keep going.

    🙂

  12. Tyler says:

    Same. Who knows how it was then, though.

  13. Cat says:

    You should ask her if she comes from a European family. They have their ideals on the perfect body. I come from a such a family and I also hear the comments, subtle and otherwise. It’s terrible. I am seeing my family for the first time in 2 years and I am waiting for/dreading the comments, the looks, the jokes. Doesn’t matter that I have 3 beautiful kids, just that I am 50 pounds heavier than when I started.

    I will get there when I am ready. Hear that, when ” I am ready!” Not when everyone else decides I should lose the weight. I am not going to set myself up to fail yet again because of what others want of me. In the meantime, I am going to enjoy my kids, my vacation and all the while watching what I eat while still enjoying what I eat.

    Way to go Monica! Keep up the positive thoughts for yourself!

  14. Casey says:

    After turning my life around and losing ~115 pounds I think we all need to be held more personally accountable for our health / weight. While Monica had pressure from her family and friends she was still missing one key ingredient. Education. Monica like so many other people in US, was ignorant just like me, and had no idea how to maintain a healthy weight. This problem is only going to get worse! Too many parents don’t know basic nutrition and they pass that lack of knowledge down to the kids and the cycle continues. We have to let people know that sitting down to a meal of 2000-2500 calories is NOT acceptable. Yes I know, so many food chains are slipping so many calories into their food. This is the part where everyone needs to be held accountable. Everything you eat needs to be a conscience decision and it is your responsibility to know what you are putting in YOUR mouth. What you eat is a choice, make it an informed one.

  15. kate says:

    You’d think it’s just her but it’s not. I wish everyone would pay attention to the stuff that comes out of their mouth. I’ve spent my entire life hearing bad things said about me both to my face and just within hearing range and through other people (who shouldn’t repeat stuff under most cases) and it wasn’t just about looks. Pay attention to what you hear other people say in regular conversation. A fair part of that will be either thinly veiled insults to each other or shit-talking someone else behind their backs.

    People are sadistic. The majority of people will use knocking down someone else to boost themselves up at least frequently in life. Some people will use it constantly. It becomes nearly impossible to stand up for yourself when you are under a literal barrage of insults. When the people throwing around the insults are your family it gets even harder because the world tells you that they’re the people you’re supposed to rely on for support.

    Just open up your ears to those around you, listen to what is said. Stand up for someone instead of just rolling your eyes and ignoring a comment. Ignoring never makes something go away it just allows it to get worse. This goes for literally everything. Physical ailments, weight gain, depression, bullying, abuse, all of it gets worse when ignored.

  16. kate says:

    Where in New England? Vermont, New Hampshire, Maine and to some extent Rhode Island aren’t as bad as Connecticut and Massachusetts. Those are just massive extensions of NYC and Boston so there’s a lot more image concern going on.

  17. Trinity says:

    How very sad but I see it everyday. I was called heavy by relatives when I was 5’9 and 135 lbs. I was called “hefty” by the guy I liked in high school when I was 5’10 and 145 lbs. I once had a doctor tell me having kids was no excuse to get fat – that his wife had four kids and still weighed 120 lbs. So of course, if you are already fat, why not enjoy your food and get fatter? You are a failure already, so why hope to change?

    It takes years to figure all this out and grow from it. I sincerely hope my children never experience this. It is definitely some whacked psychology and when food is your drug of choice and readily available on every corner (and legal!) of course you are going to gain weight.

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