Putting Aside Sales Pitches & Magic Cures
Monica realized, just as I did, that you can’t buy your way out of being out of shape and overweight. She sent me an e-mail detailing the history of her weight “problems,” as well as her revelation:
…I clicked the story on CNN just as a “yeah right” while having morning coffee. I wondered what the “miracle” would be? Because lets face it, no one can eat what they want and lose, right?
Just to give you a little background on me. Until I was 26 years old I never weighed more than 100 pounds. You read that right,100 pounds. When I married my husband I weighed a whopping 89 pounds. All I had ever heard behind my back growing up were remarks regarding the possibility of my being bulimic or anorexic. I wasn’t, in fact I ate and ate and ate. My mother was a terrible cook and by the time I was 16 and had my own transportation I was a fast food queen. I also loved the drive through, because I was pretty much a loner and didn’t care much for eating in public alone.
At 100 pounds I was self-conscious all the time. I had trouble finding clothes to fit. I was a size 0 at the time and no one made clothes that
small. I laugh at that now.
Then at age 26 I married. Within 3 months I was pregnant with my first child. I gained 80 pounds. All I heard from colleagues , friends and family was MY GOD YOU’RE FAT! What? I’m FAT? How did I go from being sickly thin in your eyes to FAT? All my ego needed was to find yet another thing “wrong” with me. I had my son, and lost most of the weight, settling at 125. For my height (5’4″) that was pretty much perfect. But no doctor told me that, no family member now said “finally, you’re healthy”. No, the comments ranged from my father, when seeing me in a swimsuit for the first time after the baby remarking “you’re going to have to do something about that” to my grandfather staring at me and then saying “I just can’t believe how utterly fat you’ve become.” My mother was also making her thoughts known at every opportunity.
I had been taught all my life that fat people were lazy and stupid. And now I was fat in their eyes.
Over the years, I continued to gain. I had another baby, and this time I held onto some weight and was roughly 140 pounds. STILL a healthy weight for my height. But not in the eyes of my family. At every family gathering all I heard were the whispers. Can you believe how she looks now??
I became reclusive. Instead of going back to work, I took jobs that could be done at home. Babysitting, telephone sales, anything to keep me from the possibility of running into someone I’d known before. I remember two instances during that time vividly. My husband and I were shopping for a new bed. The sales person just happened to be someone we’d both worked with before. She actually pulled me aside and said “you are so fat, you’re going to lose him if you don’t do something”. The other was when I ran into some one at the grocery who I’d worked with…an old german lady. With a heavy accent she said “My Gott, you are HUGE!”. Remember, at that time I was still only 140 pounds.
I began, I think, to eat for spite. You think I’m fat now, well just wait! Back to my cave I went. I ate for solace then. Food made me feel better.
I won’t keep going on about the stares and comments through the years, but jump forward to now, 23 years later. I weigh 225 pounds. For the last 10 years all I’ve done is try every diet that came out, hypnosis, pills, you list it, I’ve tried it. If I died today, the people who came behind would find hundreds of diet books and exercise videos.
Nothing has worked for me. Maybe I didn’t want it to work? The only thing I enjoyed really was food, did I really want to give that up and have nothing? I don’t know. All I do know is that the more I’ve tried in the last 10 years for a quick fix the more it backfired on me. I lost, then I gained it back plus more.
But, this year, now wearing a size 22, I am at my last straw. I can’t breathe, I can’t walk, every physical thing I do is painful. The one thing that I loved is now my enemy. I’m at least 80 pounds above healthy. How did this happen? I ask myself this every day.
On the 1st I decided enough is enough. I don’t give a damn anymore what people think of me. I’m going to lose the weight for me, not for them. Tell hell with anyone who thinks I’m too fat right now, to hell with them if and when I do lose the weight too. I just want to be healthy. I don’t need to look a certain way, I just want to live the rest of my life DOING something. I’m tired of being in this house hiding from what others think.
My game plan before I read your story was much the same as what you did. I decided I was going to quit eating mindlessly, try to eat healthy, try to exercise. I’m not going to beat myself up daily on how I look, but congratulate myself with every ounce I manage to get off and keep off.
I’m also going to keep up with your blog because you are an inspiration. Thank you for putting it out there that you don’t need all the sales pitches and magic cures, the personal trainers and dieticians. None of us are stupid and lazy, we just need to believe in ourselves.
Whew…if you’re still reading, I wish you great success.
I’m sorry to hear about how the people close to you deal with your weight “problems.” I know a lot of folks get criticized by family and friends because of how much they weigh; I know I certainly did.
I shut them up, just like I know you will.
I like your game plan. I don’t talk about counting calories enough and that will change in the coming months. I lost nearly 150 pounds by counting calories, it’s the best/easiest way to lose (permanent) weight in my opinion. A lot of money is spent by countless companies every year to hide the fact that losing weight is as simple as burning more calories than we consume.
The potions, pills, programs, fad machines, secret Chinese herbs, diets, throw them all out. Keep track of calories that you eat during the day, burn more than you consume, and you will lose weight. I promise you.
It even comes with a money back guarantee.